Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Where's my parade?

We had a friend visiting us for the weekend and I’m afraid I’ve become a terrible host for your single gay man. First, we live in a cute little town while quaint, it’s not exactly full of bars or clubs. When asked about a liquor store, I didn’t know where the nearest one was. I think we have one bottle of vodka in the house that’s been a quarter full for a couple years now.

I’ve also missed the phenomenon known as Manhunt. My computer was having trouble with the messaging system and my friend was spending hours trying to get it to work. I finally had to pack him off to the local café for its wifi so he could check his mail. I get the appeal and coming from a smaller town it must be like xmas only with half-naked men but yeesh give it a rest for a couple of days.

I’m feeling terribly out of touch with my community. I’m sure that average parents also feel that disconnect between their single or childless friends but the divide seems more acute for gay parents. I’ve heard gay people complaining about strollers invading Dupont Circle and comments about the breeders and it just irks me. Are we so rigid in our gay rules that we can’t tolerate a little diversity. I don’t want to withdraw further from my people but it seems the choice is being made for me.

10 comments:

BriteYellowGun said...

I've said it for YEARS now, I really don't like most gay people exactly for the reasons you have pointed out here. They are so eager to live by their own rigidly defined set of "rules" which are designed to alienate and segregate them from society as a whole, all while they are screaming and crying out for equality and access to the same rights as everyone else. Yeah...whatever. You aren't missing much of anything important Brian. Live your life as YOU want to live it, not how some morons think you should be living it.

Red Seven said...

I will confess that I've made some of those comments about the demographics of Dupont Circle, but never at the expense of those who push strollers around (or those riding in them!). My criticism wasn't aimed at any individual or group, just the phenomenon that happens to all gayborhoods: the queers find a part of town to call their own, fix it up, and essentially overprice it so that young gay kids who really need a gayborhood to call their own can't afford to live there.

As for a Dupont Gayby-Boom, I'd personally be all for it!

Anonymous said...

I think it's endearing to see strollers in Dupont, makes me proud to live in a neighborhood with all kinds of diversity. Plus, I think it's healthy for kids to grow up seeing all kinds of people.

Even better is all the gay parents I now see in the 'hood, and the dads are usually hot! Although I draw the line at leaving the stroller parked outside of JR's, with the kid still in it. That just seems kinda mean.

Anonymous said...

Brian, we still love you, your man and your child! Don't despair! I don't mind the strollers in Dupont much, except the ones that are the stroller equivalent of a SUV with six wheels, a puptent, a coffee bar and dual exhaust pipes.

Mike Prov1

Steve S said...

I know how you feel. I'm out here in the country and there's nothing gay here, no DuPont circle, nothing.

My entire connection with the gay community now is limited to online. My world is of housewives, playtime at the park, preschool and such.

When I try to chat at gay gossip sites or somewhere, I stick out like a sore thumb until people eventually tell me to go away.

But you know, our community has always been like that. So we don't fit in with a lot of what our community is about, we have a lot of other stuff in our life to take it's place. Don't we?

I know what you're feeling. I don't know what to say to make it go away. I'm at that age where I think I'll just accept it. Even if I didn't have the kid and the partner, I'm getting the grey hair now, and you know what that means!

Steve S said...

wow, I think it worked for me finally. If you have 15 comments from me all saying the same thing, sorry!

Daddy Cool said...

Thanks for the comments all. I realize I'm also being curmudgeonly. Fourty! 4 0 is staring me down this summer.

Steve, I turned off all the verification stuff hoping it might let you post.

Eric I see your point. I think the biggest threat to Dupont is the invasion of the chain stores. Nothing strips a neighborhood of character like an Applebees.

Mike, heh. thanks.

Mark, I've been so busy that I haven't had much time to look for a job. It's rather disappointing.

Yondalla said...

May the straight girl comment?

I don't know how much worse it is for the gay community (although my boys DEFINITELY have had very rigid rules for their own lives which I presumably never "get" because I'm not a gay boy), but you are definitely correct that it happens in hetero-ville too. Although my experience was that it was marriage more than child bearing which creates the great divide.

Daddy Cool said...

Beth you are always welcome to comment. You're a rockstar.

Bacchus said...

We get that in the Castro as well. If some of those men had purses they would clutch them and run from our stroller. I find it interesting to see which gay guys are happy to see us and which are upset at the destruction of "Their community"

Try asking for a booster seat at your local gay restaurant! It is fun to watch them figure it out in their heads.