Thursday, August 31, 2006

Hit me with your best shot.

Hit cookies, I am your bitch.

You are the perfect cookie, so light, so tasty. You can eat one or an entire roll and it's oh so good.

Where butterflies are still free

I stopped by Goldie Hawn’s house last night. Well, ok it wasn’t her current house, but the one she grew up in. Just a few streets over a little Goldie learned to paint flowers on her arms, legs, and chest and to pop over walls and giggle. It’s a cute little brick duplex on a dead-end street near the downtown. If only I’d had my camera! Oh well, I’ll stop by later for a picture.

Takoma Park fits her actually. It’s a very liberal, rather hippie little town. I would imagine that in her day it was even more granola.

Excerpts from a Post interview:

“Every year or two Goldie Hawn drives back to the brick duplex on the dead-end street in Takoma Park where she grew up. Sometimes she comes alone and sometimes with her sister Patti, or her old friend from childhood Jean Lynn, or her partner of 20 years, Kurt Russell. If there's no one home she finds a neighbor to let her in; once there was no neighbor around, so she sneaked in through a front window the owner had left unlocked, and then wandered around, through the kitchen where the family used to hang out, down to the basement, up to her old bedroom.”

She remembers the azalea and hydrangea bushes her mother planted, the dogwood trees she loved, now in full bloom in the front garden. "Spring is a nostalgic time for me," she says. She remembers the wild violets she picked on Mother's Day every year from the hill sloping down behind the house, "the biggest bunch I could get in my little hands. For days I smelled like violets," she says. "Nothing smells anymore."
She remembers the "cast of eccentrics," the guy in the neighborhood she and her friends used to call the child molester because he looked so creepy. The blue house on the corner that didn't quite fit in, that always had junk in the back yard (it still does). At Blair High School "I wasn't one of the girls in the 'A' crowd," she recalls; her social life revolved around the kids on her block who all went to different schools: Jimmy Fisher with the two sets of teeth, "who I still connect with," and Jean Lynn, "the one girlfriend who was my heart and soul," who now lives in Florida but is still her best friend.

The street is still much the same, or at least recognizable; as with many in Takoma Park, each house displays the owner's particular pride. The blue one has a row of mismatched pots out front and the flatbed of a truck piled with stuff; another is neat with a white picket fence and a pagoda-like entrance. Hawn's old house is the only semi-detached on the block, set back behind a full garden; the houses on either side of it have "War is Not the Answer" signs stuck in the front lawns; across the street hangs an old tire swing, bumping up against an SUV.

"I don't always go in," she says. "Sometimes I just drive by and look and cry."
The first time she goes back is in the mid-'60's, after she had just landed a spot on the sitcom "Good Morning World," after the first time she's confronted a group of fans screaming for her autograph, photographers blinding her. "The yellow taxi turns into my dead-end street and I finally exhale," she writes. "Cleveland Avenue, Takoma Park. My childhood home."

The block is still the same. There is a timelessness about Takoma Park. It's a place where people stay, it's a destination and not a moment. There is a pride in its quirkiness and in the uniqueness of its children. Takoma is a place full of homes not houses.

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Bring your pic-a-nic basket!

You know I can’t join any group without volunteering in some way, so this year I’m helping to plan and organize our annual picnic. Announcement as follows:

On Saturday, Sept 16th from 3 to 6 PM, Rainbow Families DC will be hosting a family picnic/end of summer celebration at Jequie Park (in Takoma Park MD near DC and close to Metro).

This is a wonderful organization and I’ve met some great friends and families. If you’re interested in attending you can email me at for the details!

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Donde esta mi bola de playa?

Children are irrational. Sick children are irrational and a bit mental. Oh I know that’s a bit unfair. I suppose when you’re E’s age it’s akin to being in a foreign land and you want coffee and people keep handing you random things like a beach ball or a pair of socks. All you really want is coffee but no can understand you.

Just got off the phone with my partner and talked him down from banging his head on the counter 30 times to somewhere around 15. The outgoing little one becomes a demanding wailer when he’s ill.

The brunch/ birthday party for my mother-in-common-law went well. Everyone seemed to have a good time and our house has been broken in with its first party. E’s fever has subsided and he’ll back to normal very soon. In the interim, deep breaths and a few more aspirins...

Monday, August 28, 2006


Another rough couple of nights as E managed to get an ear infection in his left ear. Mind you this is a couple weeks after an ear infection in his right ear. Poor little boo. We let him sleep in our bed rather than continue the constant getting up and holding routine. He slept through the last half of the night that way but his body was like a clock becoming more and more perpendicular to the length of the bed as the night went on. I was clinging to the edge by morning.

We also discovered that he talks in his sleep which is the cutest thing ever. What does a 15-month old dream of? I don't know but it was damn adorable.

Friday, August 25, 2006

Pains, trains, and aspirins

E is becoming more vocal and expressive. It has its pluses and minuses.

On the downside, he’s learned to shriek. It’s not a scream, it’s above that. Neighborhood dogs are in agony because of this sound, I’m sure of it. I’d forgotten that the human body was capable of making this high-pitched terror. He uses it randomly too. We went out to dinner to celebrate the house sale and in the middle of eating he lets loose the Banshee EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! I’m glad I love him that’s all I can say about that.

On the plus side, he’s learned to say wow. I need to tally it up but now he’s over 10 words at this point. Probably no one else can understand all his words though. There’s a little girl at his daycare who always comes up to talk to me and I can’t understand a thing she’s saying. I know it’s language because of how deliberate and intent she is but I end up smiling and agreeing with her most of the time.

So E and I were in the toy store and as were walking along he was letting out these wow’s as we turned into each new aisle. It was the cutest thing a child has ever done. I'd hand him a toy to play with and he’d say “wow.”

We bought a little train set:

He has a lot of fun with it except he tends to go Godzilla on it, derailing the train and tossing people about. Whenever it pulls into the station it plays a little tune so I ‘ve had “I’ve been working on the railroad” looping through my brain for a couple days.

(all the livelong day)

We’re hosting the family for brunch.

(don’t you hear the whistle blowing)

hopefully the weather will cooperate.

Have a great weekend all!

Dinah blow your hooooooooorn! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!

Thursday, August 24, 2006


So, it finally happened, at long last. We sold our DC house! No longer is this Debtasaurus stalking us nightly. I can spend money again!!!! It was getting a bit worrisome there folks.

I’m going to miss this kitchen. I remember picking each element and L and I talking about the design and the space and how we’d be using it. All the applicances are new and shiny and ever so modern.

I’ll miss the little garden, that slowly took shape around Nemo’s big feet and our haphazard skills.

Walking through the house yesterday was striking. This is where we started our family. This is where E took his first steps. This was a really good home.

And a new chapter opens.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

All Along the Tower

Sad news this am from the Post:

Tower Records, the iconic chain where generations of music lovers have gone to lose themselves in record-store reveries, is up for sale in bankruptcy court, forsaken by consumers who favor digital music and discounts at big-box superstores.


In 1991, there were roughly 9,500 chain music stores in the United States, compared with about 2,000 now, according to Billboard magazine. Although many independent stores continue to have loyal followings, those, too, are on the decline.

Tower's parent company, MTS Inc., filed for bankruptcy protection Sunday night in Delaware, putting its 89 stores on the block. The company hopes to complete a sale within 60 days. Tower's brand is used by 144 international stores, but those licensees will not be affected by the bankruptcy process.


Sign from original Tower store

I understand the market reality of it. Like so many others I’d rather peruse my musical selection from home and hit that download button and aaaah, instant gratification.

Still, I can remember my trek into the big city of Nashville and entering my first Tower Records. As the doors whooshed upon the cool manufactured air blasted out and the angelic choirs began to sing. It was beauty upon beauty facing the rows and rows and rows of cd’s.

Growing up in a small town in the days before cable each little drop of a new artist was like quenching a thirst. The listening stations featured new artists and not just the latest Garth Brooks or whatever country artist was pushed on the local stations. The cd racks had even more listening stations, it was the coolest thing ever.

I’ve been trying to pare back my massive cd collection. I just don’t have the room for all those cases. Storing the music digitally just makes sense for space saving and portability. Just like the arcade, it’s strange to think my son probably will have no idea what a record store is like.

So long Tower, you'll be missed.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Don't Stop the Smashing!

I never got the Wentworth Miller craze. The new star of Prison Break is certainly blandly handsome but it doesn’t spark my engine. I feel happily vindicated from the latest Entertainment Weekly in which Wentworth ( what is up with that name anyway?) reveals that his Must List includes an album by Journey. Journey.

If there were any artist that would cause me to plunge a sharp object into my ear it would be Steve Miller’s over-emoting wailing. I’m sure his music somehow spawned the flipped collars of yore.

No the true star of Prison Break is Dominic Purcell. I first noticed him in Blade Trinity as the lead vampire. With Parker Posey as a fellow vamp I quickly turned my allegiance to the bloodsuckers. True Ryan Reynolds in that famous bondage scene was tempting.

It looks like Purcell is going to star in an Incredible Hulk remake. Hopefully Purcell can reverse Ang Lee’s misguided overemoting Hulk. The big green guy is about one thing only: Hulk Smash!

Friday, August 18, 2006

Make it work time

The following commentary appears in the new Advocate:

Bombing the Runway
We're on the verge of World War III and all we gays can talk about is Project Runway? Wake up, people! The war in the Middle East is the same war we're fighting here at home, battling antiquated religious beliefs that are used to justify hatred and murder.

By Karel

It appears I’ve fallen horribly out of the gay loop. While sitting thinking about my next column for I decided to snoop around the Web site to see what’s going on. What I found was that one third of the stories revolved around Project Runway. Now, I’d like to comment on that, but I don’t watch it. I’m not a fashionista, unless you count my seeing The Devil Wears Prada and seeing absolutely nothing wrong with the lead character or the way she behaves.

My mind is elsewhere: in the world, in the Middle East, in New York City. I’d like to be able to write a gay editorial right now about a pressing issue in the gay community, but world events are such that they transcend sexuality. We are poised on the brink of WWIII, for those that are paying attention, and gays will die just as easily as anyone else.

Sanctimonous commentary linky here

The premise here that while we chat about Project Runway we are unable to discuss other topics is horribly insulting and presumptuous. My brother is in Iraq right at this moment. Do I need to post about this, to be reminded daily of this fact as I go about my routine? No, it doesn’t take much to make this evident. A picture, a comment, the word Iraq reminds me that he’s over there.

There is bad news fatigue I’m sure. The news is soul-deadening in its ever increasing violence and war and corruption. I take every opportunity I can to talk to friends and family about the upcoming election and to point out the incompetence of this administration. Don’t lecture me about having some fun with Project Runway Mr. Karel. I give my time and my money to enact change. I pray for brother’s safety every day.

By the way, there’s a nice size Design Star ad right there by your commentary and what’s that a shirtless guy on your cover. Tsk tsk. Perhaps your “news magazine” could use a little talking to before you lecture us.

This post is probably incoherent but it felt good to write.

Carry on!

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Bless me father, rowr!

The hot priests calendar is out. Go ahead take a look and I dare you not to have an impure thought or 2.

Calendario Romana 2007

I think I’m partial to Mr. July

and Mr. October:

So, who’s your favorite?

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Monday, August 14, 2006


Ida Ruben is running for Maryland state senator in my little town. This is the actual photo that is posted throughout my 'hood on all of her campaign signs:

When I first saw it, I thought it was a joke but it's completely legit. I may vote for her based on sheer chutzpah and the love of that bun.

Rock on Ida!

Thursday, August 10, 2006


First tweezers now this:

The U.S. Department of Homeland Security raised the threat level for all commercial aircraft to "high" and U.S. authorities banned liquids, including drinks, from U.S. commercial flights.

He's got a Dr. Pepper everyone look out!

and here's some unhelpful exposition from Mr. Neumann:

"This liquid explosive type of attack is particularly worrying. Planes remain vulnerable and in the coming weeks terrorists will be thinking of something else to do that we have no idea about," said Peter Neumann, director of the Center for Defense Studies at London's King's College university.

So, terrorists are thinking of things to do. Let's get DHS right on that.

I'm telling you nude flights are just around the corner.

Nemo Found

We always had a dog when I was growing up, well more of a doglet really. My mom had a penchant for dachshunds so pretty much my entire childhood was spent with a little brown extremely tolerant dog named Duchess. When I grew up I knew I wanted a big dog. One you could take for long walks, get rough with…. Something solid. So, we weren’t having much luck as we visited each shelter. The dogs tended to be a bit crazy really. As soon as you got them out of their cages they’d spin around, drunk off the freedom. One day I was scanning the DC site and came across this little guy, #62:

We wanted a youngish dog so this seemed promising. We walked past all the yipping, crazy dogs to come to his cage and there he sat sort of calmly surveying all the kerfuffle about him. We took him into the little visiting room and 62 came over and sat in my lap. None of the pound dogs had ever done that. At that moment I was bought and sold. He pretty much chose us. Sure I knew he was going to big, I saw the size of those paws but I had no idea just how big. A rottweiller mix he now weighs in at 120 lbs. We tried out a few different names and the name that stuck was Nemo. (One year late Finding Nemo came out and every kid in DC had a goldfish named Nemo. I know this because all the kids at the park would have to tell me about their fish.)

Funny thing about a dog this size, they’re really hard to ignore. His personality seems as large as his size. E adores Nemo, Nemo loves it when E is eating in his high chair. Oh it's true, there’ve been days when Neem’s driven my blood pressure up. One day he found an open bag of potting soil by the kitchen door and drug it around the kitchen and then downstairs and then shook it vigorously. There was dirt all over the basement, even on the ceiling.

What are you gonna do? He’s part of the family now.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Chim chim cheree

Tip of the day!

Can't afford a nanny? Well, problem solved. Speak in a british accent whenever your child misbehaves to give him that touch of worldly flair. It worked for Madonna after all.

You're welcome!

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Bless the beasts and the children

First the dog woke me up around 12:30 and then E woke me at 3 so I had plenty of time to think about sleep. I use to run on 6 hours fairly well. I’d go to bed around midnight and be up at 6 with just a few cups of coffee to propel me through the day. Now that my mental stress has grown I find myself needing at least 7 and hopefully 8 hours.

I get insomnia now and then and I’ve learned to just ride it out. It seems the more you fight it the less successful you are and actually to sleep. The more I think about sleep the less I get. Also with L asleep next to me I think I have to be completely still or I’ll wake him, which just makes me want to thrash about even more. L has always been one of those annoying people who fall immediately asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow. I hate that.

I remember closing the bars down at 3 and it’s a much friendlier time when completely hammered. There’s such a stillness and quiet to 3 am it’s rather disturbing. The only thing that redeemed the time was having E fall asleep with his head on my shoulder. There’s no way to describe it really. There’s safety and love in holding him and it almost makes all this stress of moving and selling worthwhile. It’s that feeling of this is right and meant to be. I can hear his little breath inhaling and exhaling as he drifts off. With a little kiss on the forehead I carefully place him back in his crib and tiptoe out. As I carefully shut the door, he bolts upright, wailing. Yes, I think 3 am is probably the worst time to have to get up.

Monday, August 07, 2006


Noted gay rights activist Jodie Foster has come to the defense of her troubled Maverick co-star and friend Mel Gibson in the pages of the Los Angeles Times. She tells the Los Angeles Times that she doubts claims that Gibson is prejudiced against Jews. What, you think it’s coincidence that all wars happen to have a jew standing nearby?

She says, "Is he an anti-Semite? Absolutely not, but it's no secret that he has always fought a terrible battle with alcoholism." Nothing proves one’s open-mindednes than a bottle of tequila after all.

Insisting that her Maverick co-star will recover from the scandal, Foster adds, "(He was) a shining example of how low you can go when you are young and still pull yourself up. Foster's credentials on getting low are quite impeccable.

"He took his recovery very seriously, which is why I know he is strong enough to get through this now." Thanks to other big stars like myself we hope to cover up this unfortunate glimpse into his true self and get back to the important things in Hollywood, $$$$$$$.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Friday Ramble

I have a date on Saturday with an extremely attractive, witty man. Yes that’s right my partner and I are dropping off the little boo at his Aunt’s and we’re going out for dinner and a movie just like regular folk. We’ll probably spend the evening talking about E.

I now get why parents spend so much time talking about their kids. It’s especially chronic in their early years. You have to take your carefree, clutter-free life turn it upside down and then shake it. Now, turn it over and fill it with plastic toys, safety gear, and flying food.

On one hand I feel like I have a new instant connection with other parents. Parenting is neither gay nor straight it’s all the same really. When I see straight guys talking about sports I know that’s a world I’ll never enter into, but parenting I’m in. In these early years all parents are dealing with the same joys, wonders, and fears. I wonder/worry about the junior high and high school years though when the bigotry and fears of the parents begin to creep into the minds of the young adults. Trickier subjects like politics and sex ed enter into the discourse.

I have to remind myself that gay parents are still new. The whole rights movement is so fresh. If worse comes to worse I’m fully prepared to defend myself before the PTA if accused of wearing my mini-skirt too high and drinking and a-runnin' 'round with men and going wild.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

cool thoughts


So Keith got the boot for contraband PATTERN BOOKS! In addition, we found out he left a challenge and got on the internet. I almost wish the incident had been a bit more exciting like slapping Vincent in the face or kicking Vincent or punching Vincent or breaking Vincent’s glasses while he mugged away at someone’s design. I think Laura summed it up pretty well for me when she said “He was an ass and I’m glad he’s gone but I wish he’d done bodily harm to Vincent before he left” or something like that.

The bigger shocker was Angela’s win. Of course she benefited greatly from Laura and Michael on her team. They were able to harness OCD granny circles and use them for the powers of good. The outfit was surprisingly tasteful.

Tattoo neck and Alison pulled off a close 2nd but really I’m glad they lost as it would have been a little awkward for the PATTERN BOOK boy’s design to have won.

Robert presented a shockingly bad sport jacket/ stewardess combo. I think he was working too close to Kayne’s product which caused hallucinations. You’ll notice in later interviews his hair is flat and there’s a hazmat sticker on his back.

Apparently a woman named Bonnie snuck onto the show, perhaps looking for her missing PATTERN BOOKS! and she was quickly disqualified for her late entry.

Now, for all you shut-ins like myself tune in to Design Star on HGTV. Interior design, a cute boy, and Vern from Trading Spaces, what more could you want other than a german supermodel.

Auf Wiedersehen

Wednesday, August 02, 2006


That silence is from all the boys and girls waiting to find out who gets yoinked off Project Runway for cheating. We find out mere hours from now. Let 'em have it Tim Gunn!


The Wait of the World

Outside of the adoption community you probably haven’t heard of a treaty called the Hague Convention on Intercountry Adoptions. It sets up standards between countries governing the entire process of the placement of the child. Guatemala has been a favored country for many Americans because of the relatively quick approval process. There are some unintended consequences of this status. According to an AP article:

“Every 100th baby born in Guatemala grows up as an adopted American, making the Central American country the richest source of adoptees in the Western Hemisphere.”

The 2 countries have been arguing for some time over whether Guatemala falls under the treaty or not. A few years ago adoptions stopped during a treaty review but they resumed as the 2 sides declared a sort of truce. Now though the US has decided that yes Guatemala does fall under the Hague. What does this mean?

“For now, willing parents can get Guatemalan babies by paying thousands of dollars to notaries who act as baby brokers, recruiting birth mothers, handling all the paperwork and completing the job in less than half the time it takes elsewhere. The process is so streamlined that Guatemala outpaces all other countries in the percentage of its children put up for U.S. adoption.
All this will likely end once the Hague Convention on Intercountry Adoptions takes effect in the United States. The U.S. will then require all foreign adoptions to meet tougher international standards, which Guatemala ratified in 2003 but has yet to implement.”

International adoption is a wildly confusing process. Imagine if you will an international DMV that changes its rules while you stand in line. Of course you don’t know about the rule change until you get up to the window and the clerk tells you oh you should be standing in that line in the building next door and I’ll need you to notarize this conversation.

My fear is that this new layer of bureaucracy is going to make things even more complicated and the excruciating wait even longer. Parents will suffer, children will be delayed in getting to their families and somehow the lawyer fees will rise.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006


I would make a terrible real estate mogul. Each little turn of the deal and counter negotiation makes my stomache churn. Just buy my house and give me lots of money, ok? Is that too much to ask. So obviously the thing to do is to stop talking about because I'm obviously jinxing it and you know how powerful the jinx is. Next time I mention it will be after having the celebratory dinner.